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Have you ever worked with someone that annoys you? Do they gossip all the time, complain a lot, are rude, talk too much, are overly dramatic, know it all, moody, act like they are overworked but are lazy, and take credit that isn't theirs. If your answer is yes, then you are not alone. At some point in our careers, we all work with an annoying individual. The key to surviving is knowing how to maintain professionalism and deal constructively with the co-worker.
A Harvard study surveyed 60,000 employees and found that 80% of employees reported lost work time fretting over a co-worker's behavior and thinking about dealing with him/her. 63% reported losing time due to avoiding the co-worker, and 66% said their work performance declined. The survey estimated it costs a company $12K when employees use avoidance to interact with annoying co-workers. Lost time in productivity equates to lower profits. Employee morale suffers when too many annoying personalities exist in the workplace.
So, how do we deal?
Remember, you can not change the other person; all you can do is change how you deal with them. Please don't take their behavior personally because, chances are, they act that way with everyone. First, ask yourself why that person annoys you so much. Think about the behavior that is driving you nuts. Narrow the annoyance down to specific behaviors. Doing this will allow you to separate the person's behavior and realize it's not the total person who bothers you.
Once you identify the behavior, begin to think about tactics to limit your interaction with the co-worker. For example, with the person who gossips a lot or talks non-stop, use a tactic that sets a boundary and removes you from the situation. You can say, "I have a call in 5 minutes" or "I have a commitment I need to get done ASAP." Limiting your co-worker exposure will lessen the stress and anxiety you get when you interact with them.
Let's look at a few tactics to use.
If you work with a know it all type person, you know they don't always know it all! Chances are they speak with an all-knowing tone that causes you to fall into their trap; only later do you realize they didn't know what they were talking about. One tactic to use to uncover if they know what they are talking about is to ask for facts or more information behind their reasoning. You will reveal if they are talking off the top of their head or honestly know what they are talking about.
The moody co-worker and a complainer is a tough one to be around. They can zap your positive energy and bring you down in a short time. Not falling for their negativity is critical. Please don't participate in negative conversations or fall prey to them. Remain calm and act professionally. Remember, the negativity is about them and not you. If they should criticize you, calmly defend yourself and walk away. It is essential to lessen your interaction with them because they will drag you down.
Rude and dramatic co-workers are frustrating to work with. They need to hold everyone's attention and dominate conversations because of their ego. These people are not professional, and you need to use clear boundaries with them. With the rude co-worker, immediately acknowledging the rude comment is essential. Maintain calmness and tactfully speak up by simply saying, "I find that comment rude." Now, he/she will mostly be surprised and say it is not rude, then say it is rude to you, and you would appreciate he/she not express themselves like that. Remember, you have the right to be respected. The dramatic co-worker needs not be fed attention. You don't pour gas on a fire, so don't contribute to the drama. Listen, acknowledge how they feel, then disengage yourself quickly. Limit your interaction with them. Again, clear boundaries will teach them what you will tolerate. Our actions speak louder than words, and physically walking away says you have no time for drama.
The co-worker that is lazy but always pretends like he/she is the most overworked person in the office is another frustrating one to be around. They will often tell everyone how much work they are doing, then overdramatize it, hoping the boss falls prey to their lies. This co-worker is a frustrating one to work with, especially if you are not the type of personality that needs to tell everyone how hard you work. If the boss falls prey to their behavior and loads you up with work, you need to defend yourself. Meeting with the boss one on one and reviewing your workload should clear this up. If everyone in the office is aware of the drama, ignore it and focus on you and your work. Let the boss deal one on one with the dramatic co-worker; it is no longer your issue.
Remember, you can't change other people; you can only change yourself. Throughout your career, you will always find annoying co-workers. The secret to dealing with them is setting boundaries and creating distance. The ownest lies within ourselves. Each one of us can change our attitude and the way we react to annoying people. You have to choose to do it.
