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This Unfamiliar Concept Makes Women Better Professionals In The Workplace

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86% of women have gone through matrescence, yet very few can define the term.

For years babies have been the focus of pregnancy and motherhood. But in his works, American psychiatrist and psychoanalytic theorist Dr. Daniel Stern proved that becoming a mother is an identity shift for the woman- one of the most significant psychological changes they will ever experience. The process of becoming a mother, which anthropologists call matrescence, is an identity transition. Women who go a matrescence may have a specific neurobiological experience associated with the hormonal changes of pregnancy. Watch reproductive psychiatrist Dr. Alexandra Sacks discuss matrescence and the developmental transition into motherhood here.

Matrescence In The Workplace

Stepha Lafond is a motherhood transition coach who believes women should familiarize themselves with matrescence and embrace it. “I think women, in general when operating in their essence, are capable of anything. Becoming a mother enhances these qualities because it teaches you to set priorities, explore different perspectives, and pivot at the drop of a dime. Mothers are passionate, innovative, and advocates not only for their children but for other people also.”

Indeed, moms typically work more hours than the average young employee. They’re also more productive in the workplace than the average employee without children. Moms go to work earlier than the average young worker and are more likely to have nonstandard work hours. Matrescence further develops a mother’s nonverbal communication skills (e.g., body language), which accounts for 93% of all communication. But for companies to tap fully into all those leadership skills and accelerated productivity, Lafond believes they must first learn to see mothers in the workplace as an asset.

Preparing For Matrescence

Aurélie Athan is a scholar, psychologist and clinician. Athan revived the work of medical anthropologist Dana Raphael on matrescence and applied it to the field of psychology and mental health. She believes mothers are powerful change agents who are the future architects of tomorrow's workplaces and social policies. Below she discusses matrescence:

“There are so many important work considerations when it comes to matrescence; there are whole journals dedicated to the subject. On the downside, mothers speak about hitting the maternal wall before the glass ceiling and may face enormous workplace discrimination. It is important that women are prepared in advance to navigate it in a more skilled and supported way when they encounter it.”

Not only do mothers shift their priorities and time schedules, but Athan discovered mothers also radically reorient to new definitions of success. “I think matrescence is a moral revolution that awakens women to larger issues such as social justice and family rights in particular. This has only become more clear in the time of COVID-19 and Black Lives Matter, where these inequities have been laid bare.”

As such, Athan recommends reframing the question from “how are women better in the workplace after becoming mothers” to “how do mothers make the workplace better”? She goes on to note, “leaders would do well to leverage this physical and psychological evolution to move us from an independent to interdependent society. “I'm not surprised by the mothers who’ve made their companies reframe the question, because this pivot is supported by a whole network of pro-social brain changes.”

Matrescence Requires Negotiation

Daniella Kahane is the executive director and CEO of Women In Negotiation (WIN), a female-focused negotiation skills development organization. (Kahane is a mom of three young girls, the youngest being born just days ago.)

Kahane believes through negotiation, we can continue to bring about the necessary policy and perception changes needed to help support women more holistically through matrescence. Matrescence and the lifetime transition to motherhood is indeed a holistic change (e.g bio, psycho, social, economic, and spiritual,); therefore it is no surprise that it would absolutely apply to the professional development of women.

“If women wish to reeducate our workplaces, our healthcare system, our society at large around matrescence, negotiation is the first step. Too many women are drowning as new moms, feeling overwhelmed and under-supported.” Lafond agrees: “we’ve been conditioned to believe that becoming a mother is just a quick pit stop on the road of life, where you have the baby, take a few weeks— or if you’re lucky, months— off and then just pick up right back where you left off.”

By the time moms learn that notion is incorrect, they’ve already experienced imposter syndrome in the workplace, unrealistic expectations on what early motherhood should look like, and limited guidance on how they can balance work and motherhood.

But Kahane believes matrescence can help women redefine and reframe negotiating, thus enhancing the skill. When narrowly defined, negotiation as a skill can easily become overlooked by women, but during matrescence, it becomes extremely important. Work-life balance becomes paramount, as time is pressed, and life for a new parent gets increasingly more stressful, frenetic, and unpredictable. “Negotiation is something that goes far beyond a question of compensation or deal-making in the board room. It’s being able to advocate for yourself, put your own needs first, and see yourself as an independent entity with self-worth.”

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